How did you choose your agency? How did they support you along the way?
When choosing our surrogacy agency, we wanted a company who made us feel like we were individuals and not just another case number. We wanted an agency who was knowledgeable and communicative. Everyone we worked with in each different phase of the process were really focused on all of our wants and concerns and not a quick matching process to just make the check marks happen to get through the process quick. What really stood out to us for choosing ABC as our agency is that the Julie and Nicole was very involved in our process from start to end. With this all, we have chosen to use ABC for our second journey without hesitation.
How did you choose your IPs? What was it about them and their story that made you want to help them?
Julie was very mindful in our matching process and kept our wants and needs in mind. Julie was amazing at ensure that my husband’s wants were also considered in the matching process as well. After a few “no” in the matching process either from us or IP’s Julie then introduced us to our IP match. They hit every one of our wants/desires in a couple and our eldest daughter helped us make the decision to say “yes” to our match. We presented her with their information after explaining the process and she said they were the perfect couple for us to help and explained her reasons why. We wanted our children to be involved in different parts of the process that was age appropriate and we felt she was ready, and she most definitely was and speaks of that moment often when we have been asked about the surrogacy.
What did you tell your daughters about the surrogacy and how did they receive this information?
We explained the process in very simple and logical explanation. We explained that some parents can’t grow a baby in their tummy and needs a very special person to help them. I explained that since I grew them perfect and healthy that I wanted to help another family. I then explained that a scientist doctor made the baby cells in a lab and then put the baby in my tummy to grow big and strong. Once the baby was born the baby will then go home with the parents. We then ensured that our children was able to meet the baby after birth and watch the parents take the baby away with them. Thus bringing the full explanation and experience in full circle.
We know your husband was super supportive. How was this all for him? How was he involved?
My husband was amazing throughout the process. After two failed transfers at first was supportive and reminding me that my body met all the criteria and it wasn’t me. He was supportive of me advocating for a natural cycle attempt for a third cycle and it was successful. He was constantly reminding me to trust the process and it all happens for a reason. My husband went to all transfers, the majority of the medical appointments and ultrasounds, and was at the birth. My husband was the one communicating the entire team throughout the birthing and post partum process. My husband is excited to be starting the process of a second journey and going through the process again.
What would you want others to know who are looking for an agency and to help a family grow through surrogacy?
When looking for an agency my most important piece of advice is to interview and research before signing any contracts. Make an informed decision and outweigh the pros and the cons of each. Don’t just choose an agency based on Name, popularity, price points, packages, etc. everything in this field is negotiable within reason. Most importantly don’t rush the matching or legal process those are the two most important parts of this entire process.
And, anything else you might want to add?
The greatest blessing in our life is always our children. I knew I always wanted to help bless someone else who couldn’t carry their own children. I definitely underestimated the exact gratitude of the family for me being able to help them achieve their dream and make it come true. It wasn’t until the “see you later” hug and the flowing tears and words of happiness, thankfulness, and love from the dad that it truly put into perspective the miracle that we helped create that will forever change their life.
Our girls were able to say hi and see you later, and watch the baby leave with the dad — giving them their full closure of the surrogacy process, as well.
